Friday 9 November 2012

Time flies when you're just trying to exist

Friday 9 November 2012
Over a month has passed since my last blog post. Finding that hard to believe.

Most of October was spent sick. I cannot believe it. The horrid cold I mentioned in my previous post turned into a chest infection, with a lingering cough that has only just cleared up. Having itchy bronchial tubes that won't settle with water or cough lollies/syrup etc was the WORST.

Work has been a total bitch - long hours meaning I've been somewhat unreliable for PT. I did at least have a few light and easy meals along the way, so the fat wreck wasn't as bad as it could have been. I'm looking after myself as well as I can in the circumstances.

I did have one active week - bike riding a couple of times! It's good to know I can move more and I'm not getting the pain.

It's not surprising I've put on weight, but how much I don't know. I think it might be time to change the batteries in my scales again, or buy a new set. I can step on and off the scales three or four times and get very varied results. It's messing with my head, so I'm ignoring it.
It's not surprising I've put on weight, but how much I don't know. It's been getting me down. I look at myself in the mirror and I don't recognise myself any more. My belly is now larger than my boobs - and trust me they're not that small. I'm disgusting. I feel ugly and slow. I'm uncomfortable. I'm so tired all the time. I'm sure that is not just the stress but also exhaustion from having to lug my giant but around.

I call this a weight loss blog, but really it's a blog about being a fat lazy cow who can't stick to a program long enough to get real results.

I keep drawing lines in the sand. Not this time. Lines in the sand get washed away by the ocean.

Stay tuned ...

1 comment:

Snoskred said...

Good idea re the battery change for the scales, I've been getting the same weight for 4 weeks now (3 of that on lite n easy) and wondering what the heck.. i might try that and see if it changes things because I know there is less of me, my clothes are fitting better.

Re the lazy fat cow part.. I was feeling that way myself a few weeks ago. I think we all do at one point or another.

I have to be honest, I don't enjoy going to the gym. If they didn't have teevees on the equipment I would find it very difficult to motivate myself to go at all.

I also don't enjoy having to think about what I am eating - this is one of the things I like about lite n easy, it takes the thinking out of it.

I just wish they had different kinds of diets, eg gluten free. I'd love to try paleo, too. I just don't have that kind of time or organisational skills.