Friday afternoon and I'm heading right into the ...
I'm uncomfortably cold, a little sad after getting yet another job rejection and slightly immobile while my sore hip & shoulder settle down.
Stuff myself on hot, filling food that will provide pyrrhic comfort. Radiate heat from the inside.
I'm dreaming of deep-pan Pizza, cheese toasties, freshly made custard, rich hot chocolate. All manner of things that will destroy the good work I've done over the past few days. To counter it, I'm keeping my hands busy with my current knitting project and am up to the gills in hot tea (Girly Grey).
Can't remember the last time I fought so strongly against myself like this. I so very rarely sacrifice what I want now for what I want long term. My weight problem is fairly reflective of my entire approach to life - short term wins and deal with the longer term consequences later.
On one hand I feel so out of control with the desire to eat all the things yet on the other so determined to not give in and get the long term goals.
This is so. frickin'. hard.